Each time I’m engaged as a lawyer to negotiate for a client, I know I’m entering an existing conflict system. What I can never know is the impact on that system of my involvement. Nobody is perfect at this, least of all me, and in the interests of doing no more harm, I try to […]
I love articles that promise me eating blueberries, goji berries or fermented foods will make me super healthy. Well, I don’t really love those articles, but the idea of superfood as a quick fix certainly has its charms, even though at heart we know it’s just silly. Just as silly, is the idea that courts […]
Several times recently, I’ve heard a health professional say the system they work in is the illness system, not the health system. I feel the same way about the courts, especially when they are referred to as ‘the legal system’ (instead of just the sharp end of it). At the pointy end of both medical […]
I’m standing by for criticism as I write this. We all know the value of separate advice for people in dispute and divorcing spouses, which generally fits the definition of ‘independent’. I’m talking about another definition of independent advice, and what my new definition might mean for clients. When I am consulted for legal advice […]
Building Your Collaborative Practice Marguerite Picard shares her story of how she moved from adversarial lawyer to collaborative lawyer. And what drove her to establish the Collaborative Practice, MELCA in partnership with Collaborative Financial Planner, Patricia Peters and Family Consultant, Dr Tina Sinclair. TRANSCRIPT Building Your Collaborative Practice (HOST) I’m Wallace Long. Welcome to Collaborative […]
Finality versus Alimony: Are we applying the wrong test? When a family law settlement is finally done, most people experience relief, even if mixed with some negative sentiment. For income-poor spouses, the balance often swings way to the negative. This is an important conversation we really haven’t faced up to in Australia. And yes, it […]
10 things to let go of to be happy
Thinking About Separating? Recently separated? Avoiding the wrong move might be the best move you ever make If you are thinking about separating, or have recently broken the news to your partner, these tips are to help you avoid as much of the hurt and cost as possible. If your partner has recently told you […]
Thinking About Separation? What to know and what to do “When I seriously decided to separate from Fiona, I had no clue where to start, so I started off by making a list of all the things I was worried about. That turned out to be a bad idea because it was a very long […]
Will Covid-19 change the family law system forever? Too early to tell? For years, governments have been cutting the real funding of the family courts. In the eyes of the legal profession, there is little argument that the effect of cost-cutting has been to dilute the quality of the courts’ service. Lawyers have long argued […]
Parenting arrangements and the family court – Covid-19 Important: If you or your child are in danger, please contact your local police office. If you or someone else are struggling, please use the resources below Lifeline on 13 11 14 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 Safe Steps on 1800 015 188 Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800 MensLine Australia on […]
Have you watched the new Netflix drama Marriage Story? Directed by Academy Award-nominated filmmaker Noah Baumbach, Marriage Story looks at a marriage falling apart while the family stays together. The film looks at this breakdown in a compassionate way and features Scarlett Johansson, Adam Driver and Laura Dern. As I watched this film through my […]
Lawyers as Peacemakers”? Hmm. Is that in the science fiction section? No, but I can see why you’d be asking your Divorce lawyer that question. I was talking to someone about J Kim Wright’s book “Lawyers as Peacemakers”, when this question was asked. And yes, I get it. Most people aren’t used to hearing “lawyer” and “peace” […]
Divorce advice from “Experts”. Knowing when to pass. Separation and Divorce happen every day to many families. Maybe because it is a life crisis that so many people face, family and friends often think they have helpful advice for you. Sometimes that’s true, but very often it is not. Because someone has been divorced themselves, […]
Getting divorced? “Get a proper lawyer, my friends said”. I’m a collaborative lawyer, and I agree that if you are going to have a lawyer in your divorce, go for proper. A proper lawyer will: • listen to you• learn from you about how you and your ex have dealt with power and conflict in […]
“Do you want to look a gift horse in the mouth, or do you want to spit right in its face?” to quote his honour. How would you feel if a judge in a family court said that to you? Put yourself in Anna’s shoes. Her marriage had ended, and she’d had to leave home […]
Divorce: Who owns the kids? Jean Paul Getty the third was a sixteen year old kid when he was kidnapped. His Grandpa refused to pay a ransom because he had other grand kids and didn’t want to potentially have to pay ransoms for them too. His Dad said he’d pay the ransom if his Mum gave up […]
Turning your Divorce Settlement into Dust “Who do you believe about what is a fair property settlement?” Henry says this was one of the hardest things he had to decide when he got divorced. He got lots of advice, as you probably have too, if you’ve been separated. Henry saw a couple of lawyers in […]
What’s after year 12 for you? Separation? You are not alone Maybe you’ve spent years feeling torn with indecision about your marriage? Unsure about whether to stay or go? Meet Sarah and Peter who both felt that way. They had been married for twenty six years. They had three children, and the older two had […]
Family Courts: If their decisions are inevitable why go there, if their decisions are unpredictable, why go there? One of the favourite hobbies of family lawyers is to discuss their court cases, and nothing makes for more excitement than when the Court ‘gets it wrong’. Unsurprisingly, one lawyer or the other often thinks that the […]
If your kids could make the rules of divorce, here’s what they’d say If you are separating, you and your ex will make the decisions about your children. But if your children were able to make the decisions or the rules, this is what they would like you to know: Kara Bishop, the curator of www.postcardsfromsplitsville.com, […]
Child Support: Rich House, Poor House Every so often I’m reminded why the child support formula is a really bad idea for some families. This week was one of those weeks, when I encountered two distressing family stories: In both of these families, the father earns very significant amounts of money. Very. In both cases the conflict […]
Since you’ve read past the headline, maybe you’d like to? Have you ever thought? Why are the lawyers making this so complicated? OMG this is costing me a fortune; My lawyer never returns my calls; I’m terrified to ring my lawyer because of the cost; My lawyers letters are full of mumbo jumbo; I’ve got no idea where this is going; This is taking forever; […]
Most people don’t want to separate and divorce, even if they want their relationship to end. Separation and everything that follows is a time most people would like to wake up and find is over. Getting through it is all you can do, but there are some helpful things to think about. Maybe the most important of those is that there’s a lot […]
Are Australian couples doing better at staying together? The answer is that we don’t really know. The number of divorces in Australia is falling, but we know that the marriage rate is also falling, so it follows that the raw numbers of divorces would also fall. This does not tell us very much about the […]
Separation and Divorce has family Consequences Separation and Divorce usually have significant financial consequences for couples and their children. There needs to be discussion about the cost of running two households, supporting children at their current standard of living, housing options and retirement planning.
Are Australian couples doing better at staying together? The answer is that we don’t really know.
The number of divorces in Australia is falling, but we know that the marriage rate is also falling, so it follows that the raw numbers of divorces would also fall.
